The Perfect Bubble Bath

The Quest For Bubble Bath (necessary for the world’s best bathtub) took Thomas and I to places he would not normally go. I say this is a good thing; a chance for personal growth and self development. I’m not so sure Thomas feels the same way…The gal at CVS mentioned a day spa across the street and suggested we go there as they were likely to carry bubble bath (because we were in the only CVS in North America that did not carry bubble bath).  As we walked across the street, Thomas muttered something about the ridiculousness of paying eight dollars for bubble bath from a fancy-pants spa. I ignored him and his whining (I consider myself an expert in the ‘Ignoring Whining’ arena.) We I (Thomas refused) went inside and located the perfect bubble bath! It was shaped like a cupcake! It promised a relaxing, lavender scent! And it was $6, not $8!

bubble bath cupcake The Perfect Bubble Bath

I purchased my small piece of heaven and, above Thomas’s protests to slow down, I RACED back to the hotel . I sent him up to the roof top bar, and skipped down the hallway to our room.

As I ran the water, I was giddy with excitement. I dropped my cupcake bubble bath into the stream. Then I ordered an excellent glass of wine from room service, and got my book (OK, so I really set up my iPad because I was almost finished with season two of Kourtney and Khole Take Miami, I was in the middle of a really pivotal scene. Shut up, this was my vacation!). After everything was set up, I stuck my toe in… and yanked it out as fast as I could. HOT! I had forgotten to add the cold water! Also, my cupcake looked a lot like a cupcake and nothing like bubbles…. I ran COLD water into the tub and held the cupcake under the water, attempting to crumble it into pieces.  Although my hand was freezing, I was convinced this would be worth it! After the longest five minutes ever, I again stuck my toe in. PERFECTION.

j bubble bath The Perfect Bubble Bath

This tub was deep enough that I could submerge my entire body and still sit up. The walls were smooth and comfortable, and had just the perfect angle to them- I could recline and still sip my wine. The bestest part of the tub were the jets- there must have been one hundred of them.  The cupcake had finally started to break up on its own, and there was a small, yet respectable amount of bubbles in the tub. I hit the jets and after ten seconds I had to turn them off because the mountain of bubbles was blocking my view of the iPad screen.  It was glorious. Sadly, the glory days were short lived, because, as you all know, Julia’s Math dictates that ‘Anything That Can Go Wrong Will’…

Bubbles Are Key To A Successful Bubble Bath

t j savannah Bubbles Are Key To A Successful Bubble Bath

Grown ups!

For my birthday every year, Thomas and I escape flee take a trip together. Alone.  As  grownups.  This year, we stayed at a FABULOUS hotel in Savannah. This hotel room had, hands down, the most incredible bathtub. (The whole time we were there we were waiting for them to realize we were not cool enough to be staying there. As we were not asked to leave, I can only assume we are in fact that cool. That or else my uncool dollar is just as good as the cool kids’.)The kind of bathtub that COMMANDS a bubble bath be taken in it.  Of course, I took it for the team and announced that I would be taking a bath just as soon as I could locate some bubble bath. The number of baths I take a year (shut up, I shower quite regularly) has decreased in direct proportion to the increase in my child’s age, so I was so excited for my very own bubble bath.

photo 18 Bubbles Are Key To A Successful Bubble Bath

In theory, procuring bubble bath should have been easy. As you loyal readers know, rarely, if ever, do things go as planned for me.

I first tried the front desk, but they did not have any. (They also did not have shower caps, which was really weird.) The next day, when we were out and about, we popped into a CVS. (The best thing about vacationing domestically is that one still has access to places like CVS and Target.) Thomas and I both scanned the bath section and came up empty.  This CVS was huge, one of the biggest I have ever been in. Surely, if any CVS were to have bubble bath, this CVS would. We found an employee, and asked about the phantom bubble bath. Sadly, he came up empty handed as well.

Undeterred, I asked another employee for suggestions on where to find bubble bath. She could not believe that they did not stock it- , so she went and had a look at the bath aisle, and for good measure, the children’s aisle.. (I appreciate her Must-Please-The-Customer attitude, really I do, but three adults had already looked for it…) She suggested several places… and then mentioned we would have to drive there. As we were staying downtown, our valeted car was stuck in some garage, somewhere. Surely, there had to be bubble bath that was more easily accessible.

Thomas sighed and resigned himself to accompanying me on The Quest For Bubble Bath…

Bubble Baths Aren’t The Same With A Toddler

When I think of relaxing, I think of things like soft, soothing music, muted lighting, light classical music, and bubble baths, and bubble baths (especially when paired with the aforementioned things) are wonderful. Since I had Emma three years ago, they have become even more wonderful- and, even rarer. These days, if I eke out time to take a bath, I find it hard to relax with the constant commentary Emma provides.  I am sure you are thinking to yourself: ‘this chick is crazy and creating her own problem. She should simply shut the door and ignore the protesting toddler. Surely, the child will get tired after a few minutes and find some other activity’.

So. Many. Problems. With. That. Statement.  (I wish I was still twenty two years old and knew everything about parenting.)

As those of us who currently reside in Toddlerville know, there is nothing as stubborn (or as verbal in their unhappiness) as a toddler. I understand that you might consider yourself strong willed- when people call me things like obstinate, inflexible, and immovable I take it as a compliment.  Toddlers are unbreakable. Toddlers should be used in government sponsored disciplinary activities. Toddlers basically win every time.

emma ice cream Bubble Baths Arent The Same With A Toddler

Sure, she looks sweet and innocent. Trust me, she has the stamina of Goliath.

 When Emma is home, I have approximately five seconds of peace during my “relaxing” bubble bath. Five seconds because that is as long as it takes for her to hear the door close (man do those toddlers have incredible hearing!) and the bath start to run. After she bangs and kicks the door until I open it (there was a time when I was in there alone, I’m almost positive. I don’t really remember it…), the questions start. I shan’t bore you with the exhaustive list of them; just know they are plentiful, oft repeated, and unending.

My baths are few and far between, which makes them even more special. A couple of weeks ago, the stars aligned and I was able to take a bath! However, it was not as relaxing as I had hoped…

vintage bubble bath beauty Bubble Baths Arent The Same With A Toddler

So wonderfully relaxing…