To start the process, I first have to get all of the bins out of the Scary Place (aka the storage attic). Things stored up there multiply at night. I swear I would not even recognize most of the crap that currently resides within the attic’s dirty, dark space. Everything up there is dirty, and it’s always really, really hot or really, really cold. It’s like a terrible third world country up there.
Hauling all of the bins down is much easier in theory than in execution. As stuff multiples up there, the bins get heavier each time I get them down. Also, most of the bins are broken in some way- a missing handle, a cracked side, etc. Due to the bins’ structural issues, every single one of them explodes while I am wrestling them down. Every. Single. One.
Once all the bins are down, the real fun begins. The first step is to clean out the closest of all the off season clothes. This is very difficult as Atlanta does not have clearly defined seasons- for example; today’s high (in early November) is 80 degrees but the ten day forecast is for the 50’s. Thirty degree temperature shifts in a single day are the norm around here (which also makes getting dressed each morning a challenge). Nothing is more frustrating than having wool sweaters in your closet when the weather dictates a bikini as a more appropriate weather-friendly outfit. After I have pulled all of the seasonally incorrect clothes, I have to hang up all of the seasonally CORRECT clothes.
This is when the debate portion of the program begins.
Instead of being excited about all of my wonderful clothes, I get Mad. Mad because my Old Navy sweaters have not transformed themselves into Banana Republic cashmere. Mad because I took the easy way out last season, and instead of sorting through everything and making a large donation to Goodwill, I just dumped things into bins (this also ensures everything is extremely wrinkled). These “non clothes” are what stand between me and a fabulous wardrobe …that and the checkbook it would take to fund said wardrobe. (Donations totally accepted.)